I'm gonna have to channel Sofia from the Golden Girls for this one....
11:30 pm. Upstate, South Carolina. Tommy and I are having uninterrupted adult conversation before going to sleep.
The bedroom door opens. Enter Skylar, aka Zombie Girl, with her cell phone in her hand, open. She walks up to Tommy and hands him her cell phone.
Following is the conversation:
Tommy: Skylar, Baby, why are you giving me your phone?
Skylar: Here. Take it.
Skylar: You always want my phone. Here it is. Take it.
Tommy: Why would I want your phone?
Skylar: Just take it. You always want it when we go to church.
Tommy: What the......???
He puts the phone to his ear....Hello? Hello? Skylar, there's no one on the phone.
Skylar: I know that. I'm tired of this. I'm going to bed. (She stomps out of our room and down the hall back to her room.)
I look at Tommy. Tommy looks at me.
Me: What kind of crack is she smoking?
Tommy: I don't know.
We get up, get our glasses on and head to her room. I turn on her light and Tommy goes to her bed, which in a teen girl's room is no easy feat.
Tommy: Skylar, don't you think this needs to be on the charger?
Skylar: Why are you in my room? Turn the light off!
Tommy: Sky, you brought your phone to me. Do you want it back?
Skylar: Leave me alone. I need to go to sleep. I'm tired.
Tommy: Why did you give me your phone?
Skylar: You always want it for church. Now you don't? What is with you people? Make up your minds!
Tommy: Where's the charger? Hand it here. (She sleeps with the phone charging under her pillow, lest she miss an oh so important text message!)
Skylar: Just give me the phone if you don't want it. I'm going to sleep. Get out of my room.
Me: Tommy, let's just go to bed. We'll figure it out in the morning.
Tommy: Ok. Good night, Skylar, love you.
Skylar: Go away.
Me: Good night, Crack Baby. We'll talk about it in the morning.
Breakfast this morning: She has no clue what we are talking about and at 8:15 pm tonight is still denying that the episode even took place. Guess we need to put the baby gate back up at the top of the stairs so that she doesn't fall down the stairs on her next sleep walking escapade.
1 year ago